Saturday, October 31, 2015

Abditory



The heart feels brimmed
brimmed to the surface of my soul
of words, feelings and musings that I cannot let go
this ache that resides inside
of battles lost and forgotten
spills over the brink and dampens my soul

I seek a place where I long to disappear
to unburden my mind
And rest my soul
I conjure the deepest of woods
a sanctuary that I call my own
to loose myself in this abditory
and purge my soul

The sand renders my footsteps untraceable
the wind diffuses my scent
the night cloaks my silhouette
And I walk till living becomes obscure

I scamper through the woods
edging away from consciousness
There are holes in my feathery coat
the pines hurt my feet
the wind blows hard
but my heart flutters with glee
I see that lone street light
that i had first met down this muddy trail 
memory resurrects the frail remnants of that cold wintery night
when I finally found myself
familiarity warmly engulfs me
I feel I have come back home

I sit confounded at how words brim to the surface of my soul
they stir up these funny feelings
of sorrows, of delights and the whereabouts of life
Its down this trail I come again and again
where I've trapped pieces of me 
to relive those moments imprisoned in time

in these locked up diaries of hidden trails
of dampened hearts and trampled bushes
written under dimmed lights
with muted sighs and perpetuated silences
lies a person I know
a person that comforts me
a person that reminds me of me
I have not learned to express
without a pen and paper
And hence I return to this carefully camouflaged version of myself
to preserve yet another moment in time

This is my abditory, 
This is where I can be myself again...